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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

3:39PM

1. Why they insist on shopping at Rocawear and Sean John and insist Abercrombie and Fitch and Hollister are too expensive when they cost virtually the same thing (give or take a few dollars)...?? Is it because they cannot fit into size zero jeans??

2. Why they always shop at the cheapest grocery stores and run people over to Sales, instead of shopping at the moderately-to-higher priced stores? And when they do walk in there, why do they only buy a load of bread??

2b. Why do they insist on eating the 'foods of their ancestors' and insisting its delicious, is it to fit in?! Does every black person have to eat curry chicken, fried dumplings or whatever...because it makes them ALL FAT. Have you SEEN those hips?

3. Why do they insist on getting pregnant before obtaining a high school degree?

4. Why do they have to wear baggy jeans and hats? Wouldn't they look a LITTLE less scary in khakis and a polo? Geez....Look up to Tiger Woods, 'bruthas'.

5. Why they INSIST on speaking slang jibberish, although they are very well aware of proper English grammar and sentence structure.

6. Why there is like NO black teachers. There are a lot of black nurses though, and they rarely smile.

7. Why they don't believe in plastic surgery!? (I love plastic surgery btw.) I mean, c'mon, a nose job or a face lift can fix that grumpy smile or 1800-slave day face. No offense. Just saying.

8. WHy do the women all wear their pants so high up with a tiny belt when they are like hippos?

9. Why do they think they will be Obama once they reach university? Honey, if you still hang around large crowds of Black people and go to clubs that exclusively play reggae and rap, you are still lost.

10. Why they have such horrid staring problems, especially against homosexuals of color (such as myself?) And why they mutter in their jibberish slang to those homosexuals? ......Anybody up for a Holla-Caust

Sunday, May 11, 2008

10:25PM - AFRICAN CARIBBEAN REGISTRANTS NEEDED - Heal Emru

Emru Townsend needs our help. He has Acute Myelogenous Leukemia, and he and his family are hoping a compatible bone marrow donor registers in the unrelated database. Please consider cross-posting.

The person who is most likely to match Emru is someone with the same or similar ethnic background.

In the US, if you are one of the white patients and in need of a bone marrow transplant, 85 percent find a suitable donor. For black patients, that number falls to 60 percent.

In Canada, if you are one the patients of European descent and in need of a bone marrow transplant, 75 percent find a suitable donor. For everyone else, that number tumbles to 10-30% percent (I have not been able to find a breakdown by ethnicity for the latter group).

This includes people who receive transplants involving an international donor.

There are 500,000 registrants who identified as African-American in the US and if you think that this is large number of people, you are WRONG. They consider it a shortage. Because of the complexity of matching, hundreds of thousands of people are needed worldwide to find someone who is Emru's genetic twin in terms of their bone marrow. None of the 11 million people already in the worldwide database match Emru. He just needs to find one match somewhere who is registered.

If 30,000 people of African Caribbean descent registered in Canada, it would be a SHORTAGE. In Canada as of March 31, 2008, there are only 1633 black people of any background registered as unrelated potential donors.

Heal Emru.

Break these four myths about bone marrow donation and registration. It is the first step to saving lives.Collapse )

Is this news to you? Then don't assume your friends and family know about it and TELL THEM. If you need more information, ask me. You can use comments, go to my Livejournal profile, or send me a message. This is my brother, but we have already met others in the same situation and know there are many others who we will never meet.

All people regardless of ethnic background in or from the Caribbean are at risk. There are no registries in any Caribbean country, but people in the islands can still receive transplants from people who can register in other countries, like Canada or the US.

Current mood: galvanized

Thursday, March 20, 2008

10:11PM - Childrearing Practices

 Hello all,

I am a university student in the United States and I am doing a research paper on the childrearing practices in the Caribbean for a class. I have found a few articles, but I was wondering if anyone would be interested in contributing to my research by talking about how they were raised or about childrearing as they see it in the Caribbean. Any information would be extremely helpful and would allow me to give a more realistic picture of families there. Thank you so much in advance!!

Monday, February 25, 2008

10:15PM - Time to make Positive Ideas

Dominica as a model for the future life.

In our conception we have been able to combine the requirements of different groups of Dominica people and demands, which seems to be contradictory and competing each other. We offer:

* To fighters for ecology (for the Waitukubuli Ecological Foundation): pristine purity of the nature.
* To the tourist business: the island, where the past goes by hand with the future.
* To the lovers of progress: own automobile factory.
* To the poor: make a reality of the dream to have personal car.

We offer an energy program to be the basis of progress and sustainable development of Dominica. Dominica, following its image of the pristine island, can provide a power, which completely expelling the oil products from the island. Dominica people must implement these ideas, the government should only be an arbiter in the construction of new ideas and should not bear the monetary costs to realize this project, which must to become folk.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

5:07PM - Will be Dominica to live?

"Beware of Greeks bearing gifts"
Homer's The Odyssey.

"From small causes sometimes have major consequences: one of my friends gnaw off an agnail on his finger, which caused his cancer and he died" - Kozma Prutkov. Kozma Prutkov - is the famous fictional author in Russia, who constantly delivers a banal truth in the clever form, which have subtext and you can discover the depth and wisdom at the bottom of stupidity.

So, what do I want to say exactly? To build the Oil Refinery in the Dominica will be this agnail on the finger, from which Dominica will die. I will not to scare you by direct threats to build this industrial giant on the small island. The bible says: "forbidden fruit is sweet". You still will want to try, in spite of the threats that our Father sends you: such as inevitable fires on this refinery, oil spills because of the tanker accidents near the coasts, air emissions of carcinogens, poisoning your crystal clean waters of rivers and lakes from technological processes - this all will take place. But some people live with that, and we will live too тАУ its will be hold in your mind all time. Shortly to say: the environmental problems are a disease, but this is not cancer. So, if I will say about these direct threats of the build, it will be in another time. Now the speech goes about another, it will go to our psychology. Not yours. About our psychology of the citizens of the industrialized countries. It will be an unexpected consequence, which will not take into account of any environmental examination, and this will be a cancer, which you did not have expected. "God moves in a mysterious way" - the Bible says.

Our psychology is accustomed reality surrounding us that do not wait anything goodness from the construction industry monsters. Take a look. The Americans have built the biggest in the Western Hemisphere oil refinery, which is not hosted on the mainland, but on the small island in the Caribbean - St.Croix, Virgin Islands. Don't they have enough space on the continent? The place is much bigger than in Dominica or St.Croix. Maybe it was built by charitable organization? No, it was built by business, which had taken into account that received gasoline gotten on the island would be more expensive - you know, in the price will be add the loading on the island, transportation by water and unloading in the continent. But it's even more expensive to deal with psychology of the irreconcilable residents from the mainland, who do not know only by told story what is the Oil Refinery. That's why stingy capitalists found "silly natives".

Why a comandante Hugo Chavez came to the decision to build Oil Refinery at your home - Dominica, did you ever wonder? Is it because Venezuela is the richest country in the world, that it could make such gifts? Well, if it was so rich, would he proclaim to build the socialism in their homeland? No, it is not the richest country and the people are deprived much there, but they will not tolerate another Oil Refinery. So, listening to sweet speeches of "comrades", remember: "Beware of Greeks bearing gifts". All of these frightening, I told not to frighten you. I will frighten you later. Now I just want you to understand that our psychology and our fears quite different than yours, and this misunderstandings can play with you twisted joke.

Our world is interconnected. You give me something, I return you back. This is trading relation, but it's true. For to sell something you need have bright slogan. "Nature Island of the Caribbean" - you sell under this slogan now. Strike it and try to search another. It's not simply to get in Dominica: no direct flights. You will not find in your services much of what attract us from the cruel winter frost to the paradise islands. I mean the abundance of snow-white beaches, such as in Antigua, where its about 365 - and its possible to visit new beach every day throughout the year. Do you have it also? One or two and that's it. No. We go to you for another thing - you hit the point: it is our yearning for the pristine and unspoiled nature leads us to your island. So, strike your motto and a thin trickle of our traces to the island will dry at all. The job will lose not only hotels, tour-guides, but also the people who spend their money: super-markets, shops, merchant in the markets. This will be a small model of a large economic crisis. Agriculture also would lose competitiveness. Certainly customers of your bananas and pineapples pay attention from where the goods had come: from the gasoline stunk huge country or from the small clean island. And if your customers do not pay attention that, then your competitors will show them the changes, which had happen. Inevitable oil spills in the sea will make worse conditions of fishing. And to whom sell the fish? The population will decrease. First people, who will departure from the island - owners of tourism business, after them others will left. Remained people on the island: 400 support staff on the Oil Refinery and 400 firefighters - at first glance, its terrible prospect, but it is so real. Where do you see yourself: operator of built refinery or somebody, who seeks to run from the accursed island?

Today American reach your island only because their attracted to Dominica virginity. Build the Oil Refinery and for to just swim with a mask and flippers it's much easier to get to Santa Cruz. It means your tourists now will be anywhere near the islands close to America. White liners, which stand at your berths everyday, will change to the ugly and dirty oil barges. When it will have started to build the refinery, guys, who are working in the tourism business, rush first to these islands, where your visitors will be tomorrow. If you will late тАУ then it will be more complicated for you.

At Russia, we have so many nationalities, which are rather act independently and disorganized. But we have the heritage of all humanity - Baikal Lake. It's the world's biggest reservoir of fresh crystal-clear water, which contents a fifth part of all fresh water in the world. And on the several dozen kilometers from this lake it had started to build the oil pipeline. Ponder, in the distance between pipe and the lake would fit Dominica, but the public felt it was dangerous and no any calculations of any examinations can influence the opinion of Russian people, who had experienced the explosion of "absolutely safe" nuclear station. Protest marches, rallies and other actions were forced to change the trail of oil pipeline very far from the Baikal Lake.

Along the Baikal it was suppose to be just one tube of oil. We were told it will be extra-safety: the highest quality of welding and metal, professional workers - everything was guaranteed. But we did not believe in this. And we won! This victory not so much for the sake of ourselves, but even for you - this is the heritage of all humanity, not just ours. On Dominica will be spin the web of oil pipes and huge towers, that can fall from the first hurricane or earthquake - the danger is so higher than Baikal could get from the one pipe. Do you understand our psychology and concern in such things?

Dominica is the heritage of the WHOLE humanity, but it happened that God handed you cherish it. Be deserve the gift of Our Father. Decide not by mind, but your heart: do not believe any experts and do not buy on empty promises.

Written by Vlad Domennov.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

2:18PM - Unspoiled Nature Island in the Danger

I read in the newspaper that the Prime Minister is going to sign the contract with Venezuela to build Oil Refinery in Dominica. One more pristine corner will be erased from our planet with one stroke of the pen. I'm lost for words but my emotions speak aloud.

The economy of this country will be finally undermined:

Firstly, tourist will not show up here anymore – which person would travel through all this complications just to get to an island with permeated smell of oil? As a result, not only the people, who work in the tourism industry (hotels, guides, divers and others), will lose their jobs, but also the people who serve them – shops, supermarkets and etc.

Secondly, it will agriculture end: who wants to buy bananas, coffee and other products grown on the oil? Rare species of fish will become extinct, giant turtles and whales will not be here anymore too.

Thirdly, all smart people, who do something or understand the situation on the island, will the first to flee hence; the rest of people will just follow them later. As a result, on the island it will remain 400 staff of oil refinery and 400 firefighters to extinguish explosions.

That is such a joyful picture of the future for the pristine nature island, which is listed by UNESCO as a greatest world heritage.

How to stave off disaster?
Help to save the island!

http://www.dominica-oil.com/survey/survey.php?sid=29

Sunday, November 25, 2007

9:44AM - Risker, Risk.

Good day everyone!



I'm here to pimp out my fairly new community, risker_risk, a community that aims to celebrate and share the poetry, and reviews of the poetry of the late, great Martin Cater, one of the greatest poets coming out of the Caribbean. Whether your interest in him is casual or scholarly, you are most welcome to join and participate! Hope to see you there. ♥


Wednesday, March 28, 2007

2:18PM - another PR post

Why Puerto Ricans are so cool...

We are a mix of the best of every race.

Our legal drinking age is 18.

We can't care less what other people think of us.

We are not only bilingual but we can speak "Spanglish"

Our women are the most beautiful in the world, (5 Miss Universe)

We are LATIN, and yet AMERICANS

Mofongo (that's all I have to say)

In PR, any road will take you to a beach..... or a pub.

We are the only "territory" of another country with our own
Olympic teams.

We do everything under the sun... because we CAN!

Because even though we are a territory we are still a whole
NATION.

We
don't need to take vacations to be in a tropical paradise.

In PR everything is really close.

Our Spanish is completely different than any other Spanish
speaking country.

We all have cool nicknames.

We have the best athletes in the world.

We make some of the best coffee of the world.

WE CAN DANCE!!!!!!!!!

They come from around the world to hire our engineers and
scientists.

We are the country with the most roads by square mile (and there is
still traffic).

We have the longest swimming pool in the world (Cerromar)

La "Calle del Cristo" (San Juan P.R.) was the first road of "The
New World " to be paved.

86% of the rum drunk in the U.S. is from
Puerto Rico .

We have more female engineers than any other country. (and you
still call us machistas?)

We know how to party, without absurd curfew laws.

We are the major RUM manufacturer of the world.

The bats for the Movie Batman Forever were filmed in Las Cuevas
de Camuy, P.R.

We invented the MayoKetchup!

We kicked the DREAM TEAM's @ss

Puerto Rico has one of the world's highest productivity ratios.

Salsa music was the fastest growing genre in the last 20 years.

Four Puerto Ricans received the Congress Medal of Honor
Eurípides Rubio, Carlos Lozada, Héctor Santiago y Fernando Luis Ledesma
García.

Only 4 baseball players have 2 Home Runs in the same Inning; 3
of them are Puerto Ricans (Roberto Clemente, Roberto Alomar and Carlos
Baerga)

Tito Trinidad never went to the Olympics but defeated 4 gold
medal champions.

A Puerto Rican, Nellie Toledo, designed the 1984 Camaro
Berlinetta.

We were the 5th country in THE WORLD to have a radio station.
(before Washington D.C. )

Junior Cordero (Puerto Rican) won the Kentucky Derby 3 times.

There is only 7 fluorescent lagoons in the world; we have 4 of
them.

Giovanni Hidalgo is considered the best percussionist in
THE WORLD.

Jose Feliciano is in the top 3 guitar players in THE WORLD
(don't forget he is blind).

The Discovery 500; Solar car designed by the Mayaguez College
won 41 awards in Sunrayace , Iowa in 1993.

We established the first lottery system in the New World .


NOT TO BAD FOR A 100 X 35 MILES ISLAND ...

Sunday, February 25, 2007

5:08PM

La prueba de Pepito

La profesora interviene en una discusión entre dos alumnos:


Pepito, ¿cual es el problema?


Es que soy demasiado inteligente para estar en el primer grado. Mi hermana
está en tercero y yo soy mas inteligente que ella. ¡Yo quiero ir a tercero
también!


La profesora ve que no puede resolver el problema y lo manda para la
dirección. Mientras Pepito esperaba en la antesala, la profesora le explica
la situación al director.


Este promete hacerle un test al muchacho, seguro de que no conseguirá
responder a todas las preguntas, y así accederá a continuar en primero.


Ya de acuerdo ambos, hacen pasar al alumno y le hacen la propuesta del test,
que él acepta. Inicia entonces las preguntas el Director:


- A ver Pepito, ¿Cuanto es 3 por 3?


- "9"


- ¿Y cuanto es 6 veces 6?


- "36"


El director continua casi una hora, con la batería de preguntas que solo un
excelente alumno de tercero debe conocer, y Pepito no comete ningún error.
Ante la evidente inteligencia del menor, el Director dice a la profesora:


- Creo que tendremos que pasarlo a tercero.


La profesora no muy segura, pregunta:


- ¿Puedo hacerle yo unas preguntas también?


El director y Pepito asienten.


Comienza entonces la profesora:


- ¿Qué tiene la vaca 4 y yo solo dos?


- Las piernas, responde Pepito sin dudar...


- ¿Qué tienes en tus pantalones, que no hay en los míos? El director se
ajusta los lentes, y se prepara para interrumpir...


- Los bolsillos, responde el niño.


¿Que entra al centro de las mujeres y solo detrás del hombre?


Estupefacto, el director contiene la respiración...


- La letra "E", responde el alumno.


- ¿Y dónde las mujeres tienen el pelo mas encaracolado?


El director hace una mueca de asombro.


- En África, responde Pepito sin dudar.


- ¿Qué es blando, y en las manos de una mujer se torna duro?


Al director se le cruzan los ojos.


- El esmalte de uñas, contesta Pepito.


- ¿Qué tienen las mujeres en medio de las piernas?


El Director no lo puede creer...


- Las rodillas, responde Pepito al instante.


- ¿Y qué tiene una mujer casada más ancha que una soltera?


- La cama.


- ¿Qué palabra comienza con la letra C, termina con la letra O, es arrugado
y todos lo tenemos atrás?


El director empieza a sudar frío...


- El codo, profesora.


- ¿Y qué empieza con C tiene un hueco y yo se lo di a varias personas para
que lo disfrutaran?


El director se tapa la cara...


- Un CD.


El director, ya mareado de la presión les interrumpe y le dice a la
profesora...


- Mire, póngame al hijoputa este en sexto... Y yo me voy a primero,
que acabo de fallar todas las respuestas

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

1:32AM - "Haciendo La Diferencia" PUERTO RICO

Best post ever!!!!!! no te lo pierdas!!!!!!!


"Haciendo La Diferencia"



Algunas cosas interesantes de nuestra isla del encanto Puerto Rico
el país más internacional del mundo.



1- No has ido al Distrito Federado de Caguas a comer en el
restaurante Mochomos comida mejicana?



2- Sabias que en Juana Díaz se comen chuletas Can-Can como en
Francia?



3- No sabes que el Corn Flakes más grande del mundo son los
chicharrones de Bayamón.



4- Y que me dices de Guaynabo City, que tiene su GCP, Guaynabo
City Police como en Nueva York y su NYPD?



5- Que Puerto Rico es el "parking" más grande del mundo, segn los
ponceños, por que ellos dicen que Ponce es Ponce y lo demás es
parking.



6- Sobre asuntos religiosos, en un mismo día puedes conocer a
varios santos, San Germán, San Sebastián, Santurce, San Lorenzo,
Santa Isabel y de una vez puedes conocer a Las Marías.



7- Puedes ver en un mismo día también a Las Vegas (Vega Alta y
Vega Baja), a Florida completo, ver toa' cosa de todos los tamaños
en Toa Alta y Toa Baja.



8- Puedes "Surfear" en un Rincón, ver que Trujillo es Alto, que
las Aguas son Buenas y al lado te puedes tomar una Cidra.



9- Conoces que Lares es unico por que se toma la leche di poti y
hay una heladera de helados de vegetales y hasta de sabor a arroz
con pollo!!!



10- En este sitio hay que cuidar su lugar por que el que se va pa'
Aguadilla pierde su silla, hay un pueblo gay (Maricao), hay un
Hormiguero donde vive gente, y si quieres saber si hay o no un
sitio bonito verás que es Aibonito.



11- Se ha descubierto un nuevo metal: Orocovis, que hay una
Culebra en el mar y que al otro lado de la isla hay en las mismas
condiciones una Mona y un Monito y que los desechados tienen su
sitio y se llama Desecheo.



11a- Que el alcalde de San Juan es Santini pero ni es santo ni
italiano, puedes conocer al nuevo Superman luego de Christopher
Reeves, (Carlos Pesquera) y puedes conocer al unico caballo que ha
tenido un puesto en el gobierno de Puerto Rico y en el de Estados
Unidos (Carlos Romero Barcelo).



12. Que Hatillo es el mayor productor de leche en el
mundo por milla cuadrada y que el sumidero entre Lares y Camuy es tan
profundo que El Morro podra esconderse allí.



13. Que Puerto Rico es el mayor "padrino" per capita, de la
organizacin World Vision.



14. Que el vivero de camarones de agua dulce más grande de los
"EU" está en Sabana Grande.



15. Por tener más de 1,300 rios, quebradas y ojos de agua, a esta
Isla se le llama "País de los Ríos".



16. Sabías que la piscina más larga del mundo está en el Cerromar
de Dorado.



17. Son tantas las variedades y cantidades de plátanos y guineos
que crecen silvestres en los riscos de Naranjito, que se le ha
llamado a ese pueblo "La Alacena de la Isla".



18. Uno de los lugares en donde más llueve en el mundo es en El
Yunque, 200 pulgadas de lluvia anuales en promedio.



19. Puerto Rico es el país con más carreteras por milla cuadrada
en el mundo.



20. Que La Calle del Cristo fue la primera calle pavimentada en el
Nuevo Mundo.



21. Talento animal:
Los sonidos de los murciélagos que se usaron
en la cinta "Batman Forever" se grabaron en las Cuevas de Camuy!!!



22. Como todos sabemos, y si no lo sabías, ahora lo sabes, Puerto
Rico es el país más feliz del mundo (Estudio realizado por Grecos
(Grecia) en el 2004).



Siente el ORGULLO de ser Puertorriqueño.

Pasa este mensaje a todos los boricuas en el mundo por que somos
MUCHOSSSSS.









x.posted

Sunday, October 22, 2006

6:23PM - De Plane! De Plane! (A Joke)

Ah hear de new Airline in Trinidad lookin' fuh Air Hostesses
to fly in de plane.
Well I tink I could I could do dat wuk, ah mean, wha could be so hard
in offerin' food and some swee drink tuh people?
De only ting ah hear doh, is dat dey only lookin' fuh slim gyuls who
could fit in ah size 4 or size 6 dress.
Well de lass time I fit in ah dress dat size was at meh Firs Communion,
an even then it was ah tite squeeze.

Well ah realize eef ah want dat wuk ah go have to lorse some pongs,
so yuh gyul decide to go in de gym.

Ah buy ah new black short pants, new white washecongs, pretty socks,
ah new yellow seersucker jersey. Ah buy ting to tie back meh head,
ah get ah washrag, pink water bottle, stop watch and ah ting to
measure meh heart beat.

See me bouncing in de people gym looking like ah Christmas tree.
All ah was missing was de lights.

Now, is not to say I never went in a gym before eh?
I uses to go regular, and yuh girl did have all she assets in de
right place.
But in dem days ah did prefer liffin' weights and riding de
stationary bicycle.
Dis new gym by me here have one setta fancy equipment, but ah figure
it cyar be hard to use.
I not dotish, ah went to school, how hard it could be?

Ah prop up meh pink water bottle, heng meh washrag neat on de railing.
Ah make sure meh washecong lace well tie, ah check meh hair,
straighten meh jersey, smooden dong meh short pants and step onto
someting looking like ah stairs.

De instructions say to press Start.

Ah press Start.
Well boy ah nearly pitch off an' lan' up in de parking lot!
What kind ah kiss-meh-neck stairs is dis,nuh?
De ting going backwards! Ah heng on to de railing fuh dear life,
while ah trying to fine de off button.
Ah ponging and ponging all de button - de ting went up, dong, farse,
slow, forward, backward.
Ah start to say ah Haily Mary until at lass ah press de right ting
and it stop. But de blooming ting stop so sudden, dat ah capsides
an' jam meh ches' in de railing.

All yuh ladies would know how dat does lance yuh, when yuh get yuh
buss jam!
Is only by de grace of Papa Gawd dat ah stop mehself from bawling out
two cuss word in de people place.

Ah come off de chupid backwards stairs an' spot ah staionary bicycle.
Ah say good, ah could handle dat.
Ah pick up meh pink water bottle, take meh washrag and meh heart
beat ting and meh stop watch and gorn over by de bike.
Ah arrange all meh 'coutrements and climb on to de bike.
Who dey make dem bike seat for, boy?
People who have ah bamsee like ah spregetti? Oh shims man!
De ting tiny, hard and uncomfertebble.
It had meh feeling like ah was sitting on ah grater.

But ah say ah have to exercise so dat meh pants could fit meh nice.
Dem low rider pants doh forgive yuh, eh?

Ah did try on one an' it make meh look like Humpty Dumpty hauling
every lass one of de king horse and de king men behine he, so ah
ban' meh jaw an' settle dong to ride dis contraption.

Ah say since is meh firse time back in de gym, ah go take it light.
Let meh do ah ten minutes on de bike den take ah break. Ah start to
peddle.

See yuh girl huffing and puffing. Ah finish out meh water bottle, ah
wiping meh greazy face.
Ah say oh gooode! Yes! Ah going strong! Ah could feel de extra
weight meltin' awf.
Ah could feel meh heart rate racing, ah feeling slim and trim, yes
ah good to go! Ah feeling de feeling!

Ah check meh stop watch. Only two minutes pass.

Two minutes an' I here sweating like ah race horse? *steupse*

Ah look rong de gym. One setta tiny winey Barbie doll jogging on de
track, running on de treadmill, flicking back dey head, none passing
de mirror widdout slowing dong to look at dey micro-bamsee.
Ah vex!
I start to peddle lil faster.

Ah keep picturin' mehself in de size 4 Uniform dress, lookin' like
ah tiny Hummin' Bird.

Ah want to play mehself in de interview.
Ah want when dey look at meh, dey go say.........
"YES, She is de damn ting self whey we lookin' for".

Ah peddle faster.
Ah go be ready fuh dem.


EDIT

Credit to person below.

Current mood: amused

Thursday, October 19, 2006

3:04PM - !HOLA!

Hello, folks.  This question is for those of you who live in PUERTO RICO or have knowledge of PR.

I have an opportunity to go to PUERTO RICO for a two-week writing workshop next summer.  Part of the cost is $600 for lodging, but i really would like to avoid that cost.  Instead, i want to see if there are any youth hostels or other less-expensive places to stay.  I'd much rather stay in a hostel and meet other globe-trekkers than in a hotel room.

So.  What do you know about hostels in PR?  What are my options?

Thanks so much!

Sunday, October 1, 2006

9:09PM - For You Trinis!

Ramesh and Sunil are walking down Henry street, and they see a sign on a store which reads, "Suits $5.00 each, Shirts $2.00 each, Pants $2.50 each.

Ramesh says to his pal, "Sunil boy, Look here! We could buy ah whole set of these, take dem back to Chaguanas, sell dem to our friends, and make a fortune. Just let me do de talkin' because if you talk, they might think we ignorant, and doh sell de stuff to us.

They go in and Ramesh says, "Ah go take 50 of dem suits at $5.00 each, 100 of dem there shirts at $2.00 each, 50 pairs of dem there pants at $2.50 each. Ah go back up meh pickup an..."

The owner of the shop interrupts, "All yuh from Chaguanas?"

"Well, yeah," says a surprised Ramesh ."How come you knowed dat?"

The shop keeper replied, "Because this is a dry-cleaners."

Current mood: giggly

Friday, September 15, 2006

6:40PM - The bilingual parrot

A man walks in to the register and ask the employee:
"Excuse me sir, but can you tell me why that parrot costs $5,000 dollars?"

The employee says: "Oh that parrot is extremely special. It's one of a kind. Not only is it beautiful but it is bulingual"

The man gives the employee a strange look and says:
"No way, there's no animal that could ever learn how to speak two languages"

The employee smiles and says: "Follow me I'll prove it"

The employee says: "Go ahead pull on his right leg"

SO the man pulls on the parrot's right leg. he Parrots says:
"Hello how are you"

The man smiles and says: "WOw, cool, that's amazing"

The employee then says: "Now pull on his left leg"

SO the man pulls on the parrots left lefg. The parrot says:
"Hola ¿como estas?"

The man was so excited and overwhelmed and he says:
"wow that is the coolest thing I've ever seen! Please you've got to tell me what happens if I pull both his legs"

The parrot turns and looks at the man and says:
"Pues i fall down pendejo!!!!!"


X-Posted

Wednesday, September 6, 2006

10:01AM - "Un Verdadero Boricua"

Un Boricua no te saluda te dice:
"Vaya mano" o "que es la que hay"


Un Boricua cuando te quiere hablar te dice:
"Mira loco(a)..."



Un Boricua no saca las cosas de su sitio:
Se la pasa haciendo escantes



Un Boricua no tiene amigos:
Tiene panas



El Boricua no se cae:
Se da una mata



El Boricua no se burla:
te saca la lengua y se te caga en la madre que té pario



El Boricua no convence te dice :
"brega mano"



El Boricua no se lanza:
se tira de pecho



El Boricua no besuquea:
se grajea



El Boricua no molesta:
jode, jode, y requetejode



El Boricua no se da baña rapido:
se da un baño de gato



El Boricua no se molesta:
se encabrona



El Boricua no te golpea:
te mete las manos o sino te rompe la cara



El Boricua no te ordena, te dice :
si no lo haces te vas a joder



Un boricua no tiene una idea:
Se le prendio el bombillo



El Boricua no fracasa:
se le quema el cerebro



El Boricua no ríe hasta mas no poder :
se mea de la risa


| -> mas aqui <- |Collapse )


Yo soy Boricua pa' que tu lo sepas



Y tú! ¿Eres Boricua?



PUERTO RICO #1

Monday, September 4, 2006

3:44PM - Something I think you should read

Una mañana un joven recibió una llamada de su ex-novia, en la cual le decía…

Yo también sentí lo mismo que tu anoche sentistes... Te espero dentro de una hora en el parque… Junto al pequeño muelle del lago. El puso el teléfono en su lugar y su impresión fue un poco aterradora,ya que un día antes había soñado a su ex novia, con la cual había quedado en malos términos y por rencores y orgullos ambos perdieron la comunicación de pareja y amistad.

| -> A very beautiful story undereneath the cut <- |Collapse )




EvyMistical→Desire


Thursday, August 24, 2006

10:09AM - Beenie Man Gets Married!

What?! Nobody beat me to posting this?



A couple more behind the cutCollapse )

Maybe he took a hint from Vybez Kartell???

Current mood: good

Monday, August 14, 2006

3:36PM - Dutty Wine?



Ok, this is officially the funniest thing I've seen all day...

Current mood: amused

Saturday, July 8, 2006

9:49AM

[mood| ¡¡¡blah!!! ]


i can't remember if i posted this before... most probably i did a long time ago with teh account sexyelektra... if u used to have me on your list... duh! this is my new account...lol


Hopefully nobody gets offended by any of these. All races tend to have their own cultures, and all cultures tend to have their own races...)


10 TRUTHS BLACK AND HISPANIC PEOPLE KNOW, BUT WHITE PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:
come on downCollapse )

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND BLACK PEOPLE KNOW, BUT HISPANIC PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:
here it isCollapse )

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND HISPANIC PEOPLE KNOW, BUT BLACK PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:
click hereCollapse )


X-posted!!!!

9:35AM - ¿Te has hecho alguna vez estos interrogantes?

[mood| Hungry]
[music| *Deftones*-My Own Summer[Shove It] ]


¿Te has hecho alguna vez estos interrogantes?

1. ¿Como Twety puede mantener el equilibrio en su puto columpio con esa tremenda cabezota?

2. Si Popeye y Olivia son solteros y nunca tuvieron relaciones sexuales...¿de donde carajo salió Cocoliso y porqué se parece tanto a ambos?

3. Por qué el Coyote si tenia dinero para comprar miles de porquerías Marca ACME para atrapar al corre-caminos, nunca se compró un pollito asado con papitas fritas y una coca cola?

4. ¿Por qué Superman, Batman, y todos los de Justice League llevaban los calzoncillos encima de los pantalones?

5. Conociendo el efecto de las espinacas de Popeye... ¿son realmente espinacas? ¿No será marihuana esa vaina?

6. ¿Que clase de sustancia psicotrópica toman los siete enanitos, para que después de 20 horas de trabajo salgan de la mina cantando, bailando y felices los muy desgraciados?

7. ¿No creen que la Pantera Rosa fue la primera expresión de la cultura gay que se transmitió masivamente?.
La Pantera Rosa... ¿era el o ella? ¿Se habría operado o no?. Porqué siempre andaba desnuda y no se le veía nada?

8. ¿Por qué Caperucita Roja tuvo que pedir tantas pistas para darse cuenta que su abuela era en realidad el Lobo?. Que Bestia!!!

9. Si Pluto es un perro, ¿que carajo es Goofy? ¿Un engendro genético?, ¿Una mutación? ¿Pluto es un perro color naranja?. Si Mickey es su amo, no jodas ... que ratón más grande!

10. ¿Por qué coño todos los personajes de Disney llevan guantes blancos y sólo tienen cuatro dedos? ¿Es acaso un mensaje subliminal que confirma la vida extraterrestre?

11. ¿Cómo puede el abuelo de Heidi mantener un chalet en los Alpes Suizos, con la pensión de mierda que cobra un jubilado?

12. ¿Porqué a Hulk se le rompe toda su ropa excepto los pantalones? ¿Son elásticos? O es que lo tiene chiquito?

13. ¿Porqué los archi-villanos quieren destruir el mundo? ¿Dónde carajo piensan vivir después? SI SERAN PENDEJOS

14. Y porque Los picapiedras celebran la Navidad si ellos vivieron Antes que Cristo?

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